Tuesday, March 29, 2005

My TV Movie

When the CAT scan report said that the node in my neck was still abnormal (before the doctor explained it was scar tissue, not lymphoma) I felt as if I knew this narrative. It's the TV Disease movie. The plot is discovery of disease (normal person whose life is turned upside-down) followed by grim prognosis (okay, mine wasn't grim) followed by disease appears to respond to treatment (often experimental.) Then there has to be a crisis. I told myself that abnormal node was my crisis, and that it was a lot better than the alternatives; heart failure as a result of the adriamycin, say, or pneumonia, or discovery that the disease was resistent to chemo, or infection and sepsis. I told myself that 'It's not gone yet,' was a relatively inexpensive form of movie of the week crisis. I should be pleased.

But I am a lot more pleased to discover that this is a lousy narrative for suspense. Turns out, woman has disease, woman gets cured.

I'm so glad to be boring.

And I feel better than usual after chemo because my lung tests indicated that we should probably stop the bleomycin. (My long capacity is good, but my ability to take up oxygen is at 65% of expected. This will reverse itself with time, but no sense in making it worse.) So my chemos are shorter and I feel better after them. And the weather is beautiful today. The doctor would like me to do some light exercise. I plan to take the dogs for a fifteen minute walk. We could all use it.

6 Comments:

Blogger David Moles said...

Hooray for boring!

March 29, 2005 5:45 PM  
Blogger Madeleine Robins said...

May you live a long life filled with ennui. Hope it was a splendid fifteen minute walk.

March 29, 2005 7:44 PM  
Blogger Heather Mackin said...

Oh if we can all be so boring! This just leaves the rest of your life to be everthing but boring! Let the cancer take that title. I'm so happy for you and Bob. Boy, do I hope I follow in your footsteps!
Love,
Heather

PS...when we're all better I think you, me, and Sarah should all get together somewhere and meet.

March 30, 2005 9:50 AM  
Blogger Maureen McHugh said...

Heather, I would love for all three of us to meet! And celebrate!

March 30, 2005 11:03 AM  
Blogger Gregory Feeley said...

Glad to hear you're better, Chemo Sabe.

March 30, 2005 12:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is Tom...

Okay, so, we ditch the plot line about the writer battling cancer, and focus our story on the little dogs.

The audience just *loves* little dogs.

April 01, 2005 9:40 AM  

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